A lot of men rattle and get stressed over the idea of talking to a woman they’re interested in. If you happen to be one of these guys, find comfort in what we’re about to reveal to you. Most women feel the same way. In fact, women experience the same level of stress and giddiness when talking to men especially if they’re aware that the person is someone who’s interested in them.
How are you going to talk to a woman you’re interested in? Here are 6 principles to help you carry out a successful conversation with the woman you like without messing up;
1. You must have a valid reason to talk to her
Having a valid reason to talk to a woman you’re interested in gives substance and significance to your approach. Don’t talk to a woman you like without a clear intention in mind. Words that don’t make sense coupled with anxiousness are a perfect recipe for disaster. So think about your opening line carefully. Friendly topics and trivial matters that make sense are good starting points that will enable you to put your mouth where your mind is.
2. Make her feel comfortable
Don’t ask questions that will make a woman feel uncomfortable. Avoid adding weight to the situation by keeping the conversation light, casual, and friendly. Don’t put her on the spot by asking questions that are too personal. The best way to achieve a pleasurable conversation with a woman you’re interested in is by engaging in topics that you’re both comfortable and familiar with.
Learning how to carry out a good and spontaneous conversation can help you develop the right skills to make a woman more comfortable. A lot of men try to build up their spontaneity and confidence by engaging in anonymous phone dates and phone-sex talks with strangers. Bolder and daring topics enable men to practice and to develop the assertiveness they need to approach women with more courage and certainty.
3. Make eye contact
It may seem uncomfortable at first but making good eye contact while talking to a girl you’re interested in makes the conversation more personal and intimate. It enables you to express your honesty and sincerity no matter how nervous you feel. Eye contact is also essential in order for you to become more comfortable with each other; and adds an element of romance to your conversation even though you’re still trying to get to know more about each other.
4. Make her feel that she has your undivided attention
No matter how awkward and uncomfortable you feel, focus your attention to the woman you’re talking to. Make it clear to her that she has your undivided attention. Avoid scanning the room while she’s talking or making unnecessary gestures. Listen to her, look at her in the eye, and respond appropriately.
If you feel that you can’t hold her stare and you’re becoming too self-conscious, try to look down for a short while to regain your composure before meeting her eyes again. If you feel nervous, just laugh it off and don’t worry even if it’s becoming obvious to her. Women like men who are easily drawn by their charm.
5. Recognize when she’s not interested in the topic and move on
Think fast and be aware of the red flags when talking to a woman. It only takes a split second to turn her off completely, so be aware when she’s starting to lose interest on the topic and move on from there. As a rule of thumb, avoid topics that are too personal, or those that violate her personal boundaries and make her feel uncomfortable.
You must know exactly where you stand at all times. So don’t be pushy or overly comfortable if you’re interested to pursue her. One single mistake can draw a woman away completely. Be sensitive enough to know when you’re making a woman feel uncomfortable. Apologize if you unintentionally made a foul remark and express your sincerity if you unwittingly crossed the line; then start over on a more positive note. If for some reason, she’s trying to pull back away from you, let her go and find the perfect timing to redeem yourself.
6. Develop the Right Mindset
As a guy, what does it take to successfully talk to a woman that you’re interested in? How are you going to keep her engaged to win her heart and attention? One of the things you must develop is the right mindset. Being aware of the position that she’s in and how she feels while you’re talking to her will enable you to develop this.
Here are some realities that you can consider to achieve the right mindset; and to put your best foot forward if you’re determined to pursue a woman you’re interested in.
Women can be just as nervous as you are
If you feel that approaching a woman and initiating a small talk with her is nerve-racking, don’t dwell too much on your fears and uncertainties. Remember that it’s equally difficult for a woman to talk to a guy she’s not very comfortable or familiar with. Knowing that the feeling is mutual gives you enough validation, and can make you feel more entitled to draw courage since you’re the man. So if you’re feeling nervous while talking to a woman that you’re interested in, be aware that she might be just as nervous as you are.
Most women find shy and sheepish guys more attractive
Surprisingly, most women nowadays prefer shy guys with sheepish grins more attractive than alpha males. Men that stutter a little and get giddy and coy when talking to women are not just perceived as more sincere and genuine; there’s also a hint of cuteness and subtle sexiness in it. In a world full of alpha males that assume dominance, being shy and nervous while talking to women is a sign of sincere and honest intentions.
Women like guys that are not intimidating
If you’re finding it hard to talk to a woman, learn to recognize that being anxious about it means that you’re in your right elements. Use the slight discomfort to your advantage because in reality, most women don’t like guys that are overly self-assured. The small traces of doubt and hesitation are essential to achieve the perfect balance of confidence and humility. And this can make a woman feel more comfortable towards you because your presence is not intimidating.
On a Final Note
Talking to a woman you’re interested in doesn’t require special skills or a high level of confidence. Sincerity, honesty, and good intentions are more than enough to highlight your character and express yourself in a positive light. If you’re feeling anxious, use it to your advantage, because a subtle hint of shyness and hesitation are signs of humility and modesty that most women appreciate in men.